You’re in the dressing room yet again losing track of how many dresses you have tried on. Not only do you still feel nervous about vulnerably changing in front of a stranger who is helping you fit into your dress, but you are now beginning to grow impatient about finding the perfect dress. You shrug off the gown and peek out of the dressing room to tell your family it wasn’t the right fit, when you see your sister carrying a gown over to you. She holds it up for you to see and you immediately know this is the dream dress. Thrilled to try it on, you hop back into the dressing room ready to slid into the perfect dress, but as soon as the associate pulls at the zipper, your heart sinks. It’s not the perfect fit.
Oh, sister. If you’re feeling excited to walk down the aisle, but not excited enough to do it today because you don’t feel Bride Worthy, know you’re not alone. The pressure of finding the perfect dress and having the perfect body is sooo stressful, and it’s sooo hard to live in the balance of knowing your identity is not in how your body fits into that dress and knowing that it’s important to focus on maintaining good physique and fitness.
If you’re trying to live in the tension of these Truths on your way to the aisle, THIS BLOG IS FOR YOU. If you’re wishing you had done more sit-ups and didn’t eat yesterday’s ice cream for breakfast, THIS BLOG IS FOR YOU. If you’re believing the lie that you are not beautiful enough to walk down an aisle, THIS BLOG IS FOR YOU, because one of the most beautiful symbols at a wedding is the white bridal gown, and honey, it's not about the beauty of the material, the size of the dress, or the style of the cut, it is about the soul of the woman who is wearing it.
So if you have said yes to the dress, but are starting to say no to the BRIDE in the dress, here are some tips to keep you centered on the truth if you are feeling ANYTHING OTHER than a beautiful bride.
Hey Lady! I know first-hand that keeping Christ at the center during wedding planning and engagement is difficult. Honestly, sometimes Jesus seems like he is nowhere to be found at all. If you're looking for nuggets of Truth like this to hold onto during your engagement, look no further. I've got just the perfect serving of gold for your every month. Are you ready to thrive during engagement instead of just survive? If so, sign up now to get my monthly newsletters that will give you that pop of encouragement right when you need it most :)
Remember You Are God’s Bride
The whole Bible is a love story that reminds us of God's pursuit of His Bride, the Church. In His Word, He tells that we are God's Beloved, so guess what - you are His beloved AND you are your Groom’s Beloved no matter what you are wearing. If you’re going to remember one thing from this blog, lean on in, because here’s the secret to being Bride Worthy, sister - As you live in the Truth that you’re loved, your dress will highlight that truth and beauty in your soul. Believing this Truth and letting it soak into every fiber of your being allows you, the Beloved Bride, to let your personality shine through, because,
Beauty is not a by-product of flawless bone structures and perfect eyebrows, beauty is the by-product of a whole and healthy soul. Let that confidence and class set you apart.
When I was growing up, my Mama never wore anything fancier than a blouse and slacks and never put on makeup. But that’s not what I remember about her. I remember her willingly learning how to jump on the trampoline with us and laughing the whole time. I remember the late nights she spent with me when I was so sick that I couldn’t do anything but cry. I remember the way she would teach me how to talk to Jesus, and the way she cried joyful tears as she explained what He had been whispering to her every morning in the garden.
My mama was beautiful not because of how she looked, but because of how she lived, and when I grow up, I want to be just like her.
Sister, knowing that GOD chose you and YOUR GROOM chose you, I pray you stand in confidence because you are the worthiest of Bride’s that could walk down that aisle.
Remember To Love Yourself
When was the last time you made time to care for yourself or just take a break? Let’s be honest, the last time I did was like a few weeks ago when I straightened my hair. Yep. That was my version of doing something to treat myself, and heck, my hair looked great!
You’ve heard it said to “love your neighbor AS you love yourself” (Mark 12:31), but this is probably one of the most challenging line in Scripture, because it’s really hard to love ourselves all the time. So let me give you the #1 reason this is important:
You can’t pour into others well until you yourself are overflowing.
I was literally telling my Mama this just last night because she always put herself last. But you know what, no one wins when you do that, sister. So get to it - love your body, love your mind, and love your spirit.
- Take time in the morning to be still and quiet remembering how much you are loved by Abba Father!
- Take time to get your brain thinking throughout the day, whether that means working through the day’s stress or calculating the tip for dinner.
- Take time to challenge your body and steward the actual place the Holy Spirit is living in. Get out for a walk. Start an eating plan. If you need ideas, check out how I have started small on my blog, To The Girl Who Isn't "Bride" Material!
I know, I know. It’s so hard to have the self discipline to make time for yourself. But here’s the thing, YOU ARE WORTH IT. You are worth every actual minute you spend taking care of yourself because you’ll be able to pour into others more consistently with renewed energy. You can’t pour out God’s greatness to the world if you haven’t let any in yourself, and just as a gal pal told me, I’ll tell you -
No one needs you at this moment, so go ahead - take a breath and turn off your phone. Go take care of yourself, sister.
Remember To Keep Perspective
Ok, ok, you’ve DEFINITELY heard this one before but it absolutely bears repeating - life is about perspective. If you go through your day choosing to see miracles and beauty around you, you will. If you think someone is going to disappoint you, they probably will. It’s the self-fulfilling prophecy. Attitude really is everything, and honey, now remembering all the Truth we just went through, I think you’ve got the perfect amount of positive self-talk tips to aim arrows right at the heart of the wallowing lies that will try to creep into your mind during your dress fittings.
I’m definitely a family gal, if you haven’t been able to tell, and I was recently chatting with my little sister about self-talk. So here is my sister approved tip that will make a difference in keeping perspective when you’re in the dressing room.
Before your next shopping trip, I want you to look at yourself in the mirror and affirm your beauty. I’m not joking. I literally want you to say out loud, “I am beautiful. I am loved. I am righteous. I am worthy.”
There is strength and power in speaking out loud against the Enemy who pops lies into your mind. So speak the Truth over yourself, sister, because,
Your beauty is not dependent on style, size, or shape. It’s dependent on the Truth that You are already God’s Bride, made holy, righteous, and perfect in His eyes. So go take THAT to the dressing room, and pull on that gown in confidence and courageousness, because the whole point of a fitting is to make sure that dress is altered to fit YOU, Beautiful.